Foster Adopt Journey

Michael and I have talked about adoption ever since we knew we were getting married.  It has been on our hearts for a long time.  We didn't know what it would look like for our family, but we knew it was something we needed to do someday.  When we struggled with infertility, we began to look into adoption for the first time.  We were set on doing infant adoption and we were going to do domestic.  We talked to a lady from the agency and decided to wait.  Then we had Tatum!  Our miracle baby boy.

Fast forward a few years.  Michael and I were sitting in a service at the Austin Stone and in their bulletin that week was a testimony of a family who was adopting and the title was "Our Plan A."  The Lord really used their story to speak to us.  Adoption became a topic of discussion again and we were feeling really strongly about the fact that, like the couple in the bulletin, we wanted it to be Plan A.  We didn't want to always hold adoption as plan B for if I couldn't get pregnant again.

Fostering was a scary thought.  Fostering is hard and it has a bad reputation.  What if we have to give the child back?  What if we get attached and can't keep the child forever?  We can't do it.  We can't go that route.  There is no way we could ever give a child back.  These were all of our thoughts and questions on fostering to adopt.  Out of the question...

In July of 2012 I received news over the summer of a student that I had that year in my class at school.  Because of some extreme circumstances, she was in a children's shelter.  Michael and I talked about it and it was a no brainer...we wanted to have her for however long we could.  I made a lot of phone calls and waited to see what happened.  She ended up getting to live with dad and I was able to love on her again in my class this past school year.  Through that, God really helped us decide that fostering to adopt was a no brainer.  There are kids who need safe homes and loving parents and we want to help.ll

That is where our journey began.  In January 2013 we went to our first training through an agency called Family Link.  The agency has a ranch in Luling, Tx where they are opening a children's home and a home for teenage boys who age out of the system.  We found out about Family Link through a couple at our church who were getting licensed through them.  Training was overwhelming and we had very heavy hearts after hearing the stories of kids who are abused, neglected, and mistreated.  God continued to confirm in our hearts that we were to be "yes" people.

Over the course of 5 months, we had home inspections, a home study, CPR training, TB tests, did lots of paperwork, did more paperwork, were fingerprinted...and after 5 months we were licensed.  We were officially licensed June 5, 2013.  Pretty quickly after being licensed we were getting e-mails and phone calls about kids who need families to care for them and possibly be their forever family.  Our agency would submit our homestudy to CPS and then CPS would select a home for the child/ren.  Were were submitted on about 5 different children and not chosen for them.  I was anxious and Michael was racing to my phone every time it "dinged" that I had an e-mail.  The morning of June 11th I received a call about a 3 week old baby in the NICU needing a home.  Quickly after the first phone call it was confirmed that we would be baby girl's home for a while or forever.

Michael and I went up that day to meet her, hold her, and sit with her.  We would go up that day and Wednesday.  Thursday we went up to the hospital, filled out paperwork, signed some papers...and left the hospital with baby girl!  We were instantly in love.  We feel so humbled, blessed, and privileged to be part of her precious life.  Our journey has begun and we could not be more grateful to be called to this journey.

One of our prayers through this journey is that others will answer the call to take care of orphans who are forced to leave their homes or have no homes at all.  We pray that God will use the story He is writing in our family as a testimony of His faithfulness in an unknown process.  God is Sovereign over all.  If we are her parents for a month, a year, or forever, we will be eternally grateful to have played a part in this sweet baby's life.

Sometimes things change....

So my last post was about me desiring to be at home next year......

A lot has happened between then and now, too much for me to blog about right now...

Things change....

There are a lot of factors that went into our decision, but I am going to teach another year and then see what happens...

This is where we have peace, in this decision. I am excited. I just am thankful for the journey we are on and in the grand scheme of the journey, one more year isn't that long. We are super blessed to have a Nana who takes care of our sweet Tatum 3 days a week and he goes to an awesome Mother's Day Out program the other 2 days. Financially, we need my income right now and that is ok. So, first grade isn't finished with me yet! :)

I considered titling this blog, "here we go again." We have begun "trying" to have another baby. I actually was only on birth c.ontrol for about 6 months after having Tatum. We knew how many issues we had the first time, so I didn't want to be on the p.ill for too long. I have been off of it for over a year now. Anyway, just as soon as I was ready to admit that we were trying again I started having a lot of issues with my c.ycle. I went to see my dr. who thought she felt a cyst or fibroid in my uterus so she ordered an ultrasound. the u/s came back clear, praise the Lord! I just have some "aggressive" (as she put it) scarring because of my c-section scar. Anyway, I had to go back on b.irth c.ontrol to try to regulate my cycles. I will be on it for 3 months and then we will go from there. This time around is so different. We desire to have more children, but we also have a sweet miracle boy already. We don't deserve him or any more for that matter. It's all an abundance of grace. This time around is really, really different...in a peaceful way.

Tatum James is almost 20 months. I cannot believe I am thinking about my baby boy's 2nd birthday party already! Time really does fly. He is ALL BOY. I am often saying, "he is like a bull in a china closet."

Tatum is rough and tumble. He likes to run. He LOVES to be outside. He likes to spin in circles until he falls down. He loves to slide. He really likes making truck noises. He doesn't like naps because it means he is missing something. He is a super picky eater. He laughs when he is disciplined unless it is timeout...that works for now. He laughs a lot. He does the robot dance, gets his "guns up" and shows his muscles. He loves to read his "Bibles" as he calls it. He is obsessed with guitars and loves to hold them and play them. He loves music (which he calls lolly). He likes to ride in the jeep more than the honda. He wants "wader" a lot (but really means a little apple juice with water). He wears 2T and 3T clothes. He says "wuv you" which will melt your heart. That is our boy in a nut shell! We are so blessed by this boy and definitely on our toes all the time! :)

We are still amazed each week at ARCC to see the way God is blessing His church. We are growing and we are seeing the Lord change hearts and lives. We are humbled and so thankful for the opportunity to be leading and serving there. I get really overwhelmed when I think about all of the relationships the Lord has given to us in and through the starting of this church. He is so good and has answered so many of our specific prayers. We are just so excited to see all He has planned in the coming days. Michael is doing an amazing job as a lead pastor. I may be a little biased, but I think others would agree! ;) He is anointed to teach the Word. If you want to hear a sermon you can get the podcasts on the website at www.arcc.net. Michael has a gift of communicating the gospel. We are currently going through Mark. I am so thankful for Michael's leadership, not just of his family, but of the church as well. I am humbled to get to do this with him. We are blessed beyond measure and are just loving life. We know that in all things, our Sovereign Lord is faithful and in total control. We rest in that, we lead in that, we parent in that, and we just try to walk daily in that truth. We pray the same for our families, our friends, and our church family.

Heart's Desire

I am a teacher. I wanted to be a teacher for as long as I can remember. I love my job. I have put a lot of effort into what I do. I have stayed too late and brought too much home. I have shed tears over students. I have been doing what I felt like I was meant to do for 6 years....

and then God blessed me with a miracle baby who needs his mommy and God entrusted us with His church...to lead...and shepard...

God changes the heart. He calls. He commands. He requires obedience. As Michael has taken the role of lead pastor of a young church plant, my role has changed. I had no idea how much it would change as a pastor's wife. I had no idea that all of a sudden, my heart would be burdened, not by first graders, but by women in the church. My heart would yearn for ladies to become disciples. My heart aches for women who are hurting within their marriages. God is making it clearer and clearer that I am to partner full time with Michael next year. I am to be available for whatever...

Obedience is hard. Obedience means faith. Faith that brings about questions....faith that brings about fear that constantly has to be repented of... Faith that says, "If you are calling, Lord, then Yes, I will obey."

So many questions, so many what-ifs, so many financial obstacles....He's calling though...I know He is...and I know it's going to require obedience. So, my heart's desire is to get to stay home next year and not go back to teaching (I NEVER thought I would say that)! My heart's desire is to be able to serve alongside my husband and serve him as he leads ARCC. My heart's desire is to be home with my son to teach him and nurture him. My heart's desire is to disciple...to have ladies in my home to love and encourage. God is so faithful. Praying for bigger faith through these worldly eyes....just wanting to fix them on Jesus...just wanting to obey.... but a little scared of this heart's desires.

1st Birthday....Help!

Fellow moms: what are some fun activity ideas for a first birthday party? We are having Tatum's party at our house and our house is small. It is hot outside so I am trying to come up with some indoor activities. Let me know of any that you did or have seen done that worked well!

I am already planning to do a craft table where the kids decorate a paper necktie (we are doing a "little man" themed party).

I'm open to any and all suggestions! :)

Alamo Ranch Community Church

In January, the 16th to be exact, we launched a church in Northwest San Antonio. When we moved to San Antonio we jumped right in to serve alongside Michael's dad at Vineyard Hills Church. Michael became the worship leader and we were on leadership. We were happy to serve where there was a need. Michael was called to preach when we were in college and knew that someday he would have that opportunity. VH ran about 30 people on a Sunday and we were kind-of at a place where we stopped growing. We were at this place for a few years even. We (the leadership) all felt as if God might be calling us to do something else. We began to pray. Michael was a middle school math teacher in an area of San Antonio where there is a tremendous amount of growth. On his drive to work each day, he noticed how few churches there were in this part of SA. He began to tell me that he thought God may be calling us to re-plant VH in this particular area. During this time, Michael's dad felt like it was time to hand over the preaching to Michael, so in October he took on the preaching full time at VH.

Michael could not escape the call he felt in his heart to Northwest San Antonio (specifically the Alamo Ranch area). We all began praying and we met with all of the people of VH to ask if they would be willing to go with us if we re-planted. (This new area is quite a drive for a lot of them) All of our members at VH said they would go! So it began, the praying and planning...

January 16th was the launch Sunday for Alamo Ranch Community Church. We are meeting in an elementary school in the AR neighborhood. We were so excited (but nervous at the same time). As people kept coming in the doors that Sunday, we felt such a comfirmation from the Lord that Michael had been obedient to the call west! Ever since that Sunday, we have averaged about 135 people to love on and minister to. We hear so many people say that they were waiting and praying for a church in their area.

So, here we were, 135 people to minister to.....and a pastor/worship leader who also taught middle school math! Michael and I began to pray that God would open the door for him to be able to resign his position as a math teacher so he could pastor full time in the fall. A few months before school got out for summer, Michael turned in his resignation letter to the school district. We are so excited! The time he was having to devote to studying the word and meeting iwth people after school hours, did not allow us to have family time. We are so thankful that God has given us the go on him pastoring full time. We aren't 100% on the finances as a church to pay him salary, but we are trusting and praying! Our elders have gone to our people to ask them to pray about giving over and above so their pastor can go on full time. We know God is able and we feel like this was the right step of obedience for our family.

We are so humbled for the opportunity to serve the Alamo Ranch community and beyond. I am thankful for a husband who leads us in faith and obedience. I am confident that the Lord will provide.

10 Months

We are still here! Tatum is 10 months old today! I never knew what people meant by "time flies" and "they grow up so fast" until now! Holy cow! We are 2 months away from having a one year old in the McCracken house. It is unbelievable!

When Tatum went to the Dr. for his 9 month checkup he weighed 22 pounds. I am sure by now he is 25! He was in the 75% for his weight and height and 90% for his head. We have a big boy on our hands!

I am absolutely loving being home with him for the summer. He is so much fun. At 10 months he is pointing, crawling super fast, pulling up on everything, walking along furniture, standing on his own for a few seconds at a time, babbling a lot, eating cheerios and lots of puffs... and a lot of other fun things! He loves to go to the pool and he loves to be outside. Tatum means bringer of joy and he is certainly living up to his name! We are so blessed!

Mother's Day

So tomorrow is my very first mother's day. I am overjoyed as I type that sentence and as I sit here thinking of my beautiful and healthy 8 month old sleeping in the next room. I am overwhelmed by the faithfulness of the Lord and His grace upon my life.

In my joy, I am also heavy-hearted. My heart is heavy for those I know who want so badly to be moms and haven't been able to have children. My heart is so heavy. I used to dread Mother's Day. It used to be a super emotional day and selfishly I used to wish we could just pretend like it wasn't mother's day even though I wanted to honor my own mom.

So, tomorrow, I am celebrating Jesus's power to answer our hearts' cries for our own child. I am celebrating my mom, who has endured so much in her life and still presses on. I am celebrating that God answers prayers....and I will be praying without ceasing for my friends who are hurting so badly on their infertility journeys. Oh, Jesus, be near to my precious friends who want the blessing of children. Father, open their wombs and heal their bodies. Father give them peace in You and satisfy their souls with your presence. Be glorified in their stories and in ours!

Half a Year

I cannot believe that Tatum is 6 months old! I keep saying, "that's half a year!!!" Here are his current stats!

• 26 inches long
• 17.15 pounds
• 50th percentile for weight and height
• 90th percentile for head (the Dr. said his brain is still growing) His body has to catch up with this head! :)

Tatum is healthy and happy! He has started eating veggies, which he is not a fan of...must get this from daddy! He makes the funniest faces when he's eating veggies, that is when I can get him to open his mouth!

We are still working on those naps. If you have any pointers on nap schedules, I am all ears! He is sleeping 11-12 hours each night which is amazing.

We love our "bringer of joy" and are continuously humbled by the grace the Lord pours out over our lives. Happy 6 months sweet baby boy!

Real

So, I've debated over posting this for some time now...but tonight Tatum is sleeping and Michael is at a meeting....and I can't stop thinking about it. I am going to be pretty raw here because I have to. I'm not even sure who will read, I just need to journal what is going on in my heart and has been for a while.

I gave my life to Christ when I was 9 years old. In that moment, I was saved by grace, through faith. Following my decision to follow Christ I found myself getting very wrapped up in the do's and don'ts of life (legalism). I had some things happening in my family that were pretty tough and wanted to make sure our "image" at church was not hurt. I did everything in my own power to make sure everyone thought I had it all together. I wanted my reputation to be the "good Christian" girl. I really struggled because in my heart, I wanted to passionately desire Christ, but all I could find myself doing was checking things off the list.

Fast forward to college. God led me to Texas Tech and really got ahold of my heart. I learned what it meant to be a disciple of Christ. I had amazing women in my life like Janis and Melissa who discipled me. I had incredible roommates who walked with Christ in front of me. I learned. I grew. I felt passionate in my love for Christ. I felt hungry. I am humbled that God would even, in His grace, place such incredible people in my life to spur me on and challenge me....people who weren't afraid to ask me tough questions. In all the struggles I shared, I don't even know that I ever came to a place of confessing and admitting that I really struggle to be completely "real."

So why do I share this? I have had an excessively long dry season in my walk with the Lord. I have let the enemy completely convince me that if I read the Word, it's just me trying to check it off the list and if that's the motive then I just shouldn't do it. What a lie! I am tired of having conviction and not acting on it. I am tired of seeing Michael in the Word every day and just thinking, "must be nice that he has time for that." I have let the enemy convince me that I don't have time and if I don't have enough time, I might as well just not get in the Word. In the past 5 months I have become a mom and a pastor's wife. These are both areas where my struggle to be totally real will be even harder.

So, in all of this rambling...what is my point? I want to be real. Transparent. I desire to know Christ. I desire to study His Word. I will not let the enemy have victory over me in this area. So, here it is, real me...admitting that I have kind of stunk for a while. I am don't want to be dry. I feel like I don't even know where to start...but I know I have to start somewhere...

5 Months

It's so crazy how much life can change so quickly! Our little man was 5 months old on January 20th and I can't even remember what life was like without him! We are so blessed by this miracle baby and just can't get enough of those chunky cheeks!

Our sweet Tatum,

Your name means "bringer of joy" and how true that is for your life. Your life on this earth already brings so much glory to God.

You are officially a PK (preacher's kid)! You would be so proud of your daddy. He is an amazing communicator of the Word. I can't wait for you to hear him preach some day. As for now, you are holding down the fort in the nursery of Alamo Ranch Community Church. There have been more kids in the nursery and we are praying that they will become your best buds!

You have started to sit up on your own for a few seconds at a time! You start to lean to the side or forward after a few seconds. You want to reach for everything and are starting to show a little bit of a strong will! Nana says you always want the remote control and you get mad when she takes it away! You have started to say "bah" and "dah," which we love to hear!

You have a very high pitched squealy cry when you are sleepy and you rub your eyes a lot. For some reason though you will only nap for about 45 minutes at a time. We think you are already afraid you are going to miss something...your daddy says that means you are just like me! You are constantly looking around to check out everything around you.

You have started soaking your bibs within a few hours. We are pretty sure you'll be getting a tooth soon! You like so sleep on your tummy and it makes you mad when you roll on your back during the night. We love to go in your room after you've gone to bed to see you sleeping with your little bottom in the air! My favorite thing is to hear you waking up in the mornings. You wake up happy and just talk and talk in your crib. I love walking in to your room to say good morning! You always greet me with a huge grin!

When daddy says your prayers at night, you grin at the sound of his voice. You are always reaching out and trying to grab daddy's nose while he's praying. We laugh and we praise Jesus for laughter.

Tatum, you have only been in our arms for 5 months and we can't imagine life without you sweet boy! You are a constant reminder of the love of Jesus and of His grace upon our lives. We love you sweet boy! Happy 5 months!

Love,

Mommy

Life with the Little Man

I am constantly surprised at the fact that so much time goes by between each of my blogs. I really thought once Tatum was born I would blog all the time on all of the events of his little life. (not sure why I thought I would have time!) I am sad that I haven't documented each month better. So, I want to be a better blogger!

It is so hard to believe that our miracle boy who we prayed for for so long is almost 5 months old! December 18th marked the one year anniversary of the day I found out that I was pregnant! Time truly flies! Some things about our sweet Tatum in his 4th month of life:

• He is eating rice cereal and oatmeal. He leans forward with his mouth wide open in anticipation of the next bite!
• He rolls from stomach to back and back to stomach. This is all fun until it's bed time! He likes to sleep on his tummy and when he rolls onto his back he gets really mad, resulting in a screaming baby in the middle of the night!
• He is sleeping from about 7:30 pm to 5 am. We are hoping that 5 am wake time will get later soon!
• He is a drool king!
• He grabs at anything and everything. If he happens to hold on to something it goes directly to his mouth!
• He LOVES his daddy! Michael can just look at him and that boy lights up with a huge grin! When Michael is in the room Tatum just follows him with his eyes everywhere he goes.
• He loves to take baths and splashes like a crazy man.
• He loves his wubbanub monkey paci.
• A book I was reading about sleep says to have a "key phrase" when putting baby down to sleep. Mine is, "mommy loves you, daddy loves you, but Jesus loves you more!"
• He laughs out loud but the things that make him laugh can never be duplicated.
• Tatum loves his Jumperoo that he got for Christmas.
• He furrows his brow for his really "serious" look!
• When we pray with Tatum before bed, every night Michael prays for his salvation, his friends, and his future wife.

So, there you have it! Tatum James in his 4th month of life. We are thankful and humbled. I will say that being at work has been harder than I expected. I always thought it would be easy for me to work and be a mom. It's overwhelming. Some days I feel like I stink at everything...teaching, being a wife, and being a mom. I have to give this up constantly. I will also say that I feel like I am doing what I am supposed to do right now for my family. We are so blessed to have Michael's mom keep Tatum! She comes to our house every day. When I get home, my laundry is done and my house cleaned. We are so blessed. I love knowing Tatum is spending his days one-on-one with his precious Nana.

This Sunday, January 16th, we are launching Alamo Ranch Community Church. We are so excited! God has called us to the West side of San Antonio where there is a TON of growth and there aren't many churches. Michael is the lead pastor of ARCC. We are praying for growth. We are praying to reach this community for Christ. We are trusting God. We have taken a step of faith. We are trusting God.

I have been inspired like never before to blog more, to journal our lives, to share about the Jesus we love and want to be just like...

The Birth Story...Finally

Ok, so 2 months later, I am just now sitting down to type this out! Here is the story of the day we witnessed a miracle!

I went to the doctor on August 19th, one day after my due date. The doctor hooked me up to a monitor to discover that I was ha

ving some contractions, I just didn't know. I hadn't dilated at all yet but Tatum was measuring 9 lbs 2 oz on the ultrasound! Dr. King told us that we could come in that evening to start the induction process. She also said we could wait to see if I go into labor on my own in the next week. She told us that if we induce, my chances of c-section would increase. She also said if we waited to see if I would go into labor on my own, Tatum would just get bigger...which would also increase my chances of a c-section. She left Michael and I alone so we could make the decision. We decided to go ahead and go in that afternoon to start the induction process.

After the appointment, I went back up

to school to finish preparing my room for Meet the Teacher that my sub would have to take care of that afternoon! Michael came home to clean up a little and finish packing our bags. We checked in to the hospital at 4:30 PM on August 19th. Dr. King gave me something to soften my cer.vix, they started my IV and we just chilled in our hospital room for the evening and night! The next morning, they started the pitocin about 6 AM. Dr. King came in to break my water around 9 that morning. Once she broke my water the contractions started coming on really strong. At one point they had to slow down the pitocin because I wasn't getting any time in between contractions. Each time Dr. King came in to check me I had dilated another centimeter. I did end up getting my epidural when I was 4 cm. By 5 PM I had dilated to 9 centimeters! Dr. King told us it would be a few more hours and I'd be ready to push. A few hours later, I was still 9 cm. They ended up puttingme on oxygen because Tatum's heart rate was dropping. They monitored Tatum and me closely for about 45 more minutes and then Dr. King made the call to do the c-section. Michael got all dress

ed for the OR and I was wheeled into the OR. At 8:05 PM I heard the amazing cry of our precious miracle baby. As soon as he came out all I heard in the OR were the doctors and nurses going crazy over how big he was. Dr. King was sure he was 9 lbs. He ended up weighing 8 lbs 12 oz. He was 21 5/8 inches long. I was in recovery for a little over an hour.

I finally got to hold our sweet boy at about 11:45 PM that night. It was all so surreal. My parents were at the hospital, Michael's parents, and our friends Jon Paul& Crystal. In these moments I had NO IDEA of how radically my life would be changed in the coming weeks!

Next blog will be about the first week of little man's life and the first week of being a mom!

Our Miracle, Baby Tatum

Meals Schmeals....

I'm having trouble planning meals for this upcoming week....

If you have a recipe you would be willing to share I'm all ears! (or eyes I guess since I'll be reading it!)

Thanks! :)

All My Bags are Packed....

I'm ready to go....kind of!

I would love to know your hospital "must-haves" that you took or didn't take and wish you had when you were at the hospital to have your baby!

My bag is packed for the most part, but I would love to know what you took that you couldn't have done without!

My due date is 2 weeks from tomorrow! I am getting so incredibly excited to meet our baby boy! The doctor did tell me at my last appointment that she predicts I am going to go over my due date which made me a little sad. I know that God is in control and He already knows Tatum's birthday. So, if we wait, we wait. If you have time, let me know what I need in that hospital bag!

It's Been A While...

Somewhere between finding out we were having a boy and now, at 8 months pregnant, I have dropped blogging. I can't really even think of a good reason why. As I sit here now typing this, Michael is in Haiti. He has been gone since Thursday and will get home on Saturday. I miss him like crazy, but am so excited about what God is going in and through him over there. There is a team of 8 from our church building shelters for the Haitian people. I can't wait to hear all of his stories!

I think it is still surreal to me, even though I am clearly 36 weeks pregnant in so many ways, that we are having a baby! I am just still in awe of this miracle baby!

Here are some things that I want to remember about this pregnancy and things that I am so thankful for (some in a weird way!)...

1. I have had an intense sweet tooth during pregnancy, which is soooo not me! I would always pass up dessert before and now....well....I can't resist the sweets!

2. I have put on an excessive amount of weight...including an 8 pound weight gain between 2 week doctor appointments!

3. Maternity clothes that looked like they would never fit in the beginning are put away because I have now outgrown them!

4. Tatum is super active! We love to just watch my belly move. Sometimes I wonder if there really is only 1 baby in there because I can't figure out his acrobatics!

5. I haven't been able to wear my wedding rings in a really long time and can't wait to wear them again!

6. We have had so much fun getting Tatum's room ready and putting together his swing, bouncy, pack and play, and stroller!

7. Baby items require a lot of batteries!

8. Baby items take up a lot of space. I feel like we are outgrowing our house quickly!

9. I am measuring a cm big. The doctor says this could be a big baby!

10. I am a little scared and anxious about the "unknown" that is labor and delivery.

11. Walking 30 minutes a day is hard...really hard!

12. My hands and feet/ankles like to swell a lot!

13. I love the smell of Dreft and have had a lot of fun washing all of Tatum's clothes.

14. Tatum has a ton of clothes! Maybe more than his mommy and daddy! :)

15. God is preparing me for less sleep as sleep is hard these days because of discomfort.

We are so thankful, overwhelmed, humbled, blessed....I could go on and on. I can't wait to post pictures of our sweet little man! That will be a surreal day for me because I honestly wasn't sure when or if I would get to blog posting pictures of my own baby! God is so good!

We're having a.....

baby BOY!!!!!!

We could not be more excited. After our appointment we went straight to Babies R Us to purchase the first baby outfit! :) It was so much fun! His name is going to be Tatum James McCracken! I want to call him Tate!

I can't wait to tell this sweet baby boy how many people prayed for his little life. I cannot wait to tell him about God's faithfulness and grace upon us to bless us with him. What a precious gift.

Thank you for your prayers. Thank you for all of your encouragement these past few years. We feel so blessed and can't wait to meet our miracle baby boy! :)

Baby Poll!

Ok, a week from today we find out if our sweet baby is a boy or a girl! And to answer the questions of many...no, I have no feeling one way or the other! I have no idea! :) I want to see what you all think! Leave me a comment to say if you think baby McCracken is a boy or a girl! I'll make sure to let you know as soon as we find out next Tuesday! We can hardly wait!

Also, if you have "must haves" that we need to register for, let me know that too! Thanks!

Hello Again Blog World

Wow, it has been so long since I've posted! I tend to do that and then my posts end up being waaayyyy to0 long...so I'll try to just include some highlights about pregnancy and baby! I still can't believe that I get to blog about having a baby! It's so amazing!

• Pregnancy is so much fun, even when I'm puking!
• Oatmeal is not my friend anymore!
• My gag reflex is really bad!
• I gained 5 pounds between Dr. appointments. (too much chick-fil-a)
• I loved chick-fil-a before, but now, I LOVE chick-fil-a! This is not good considering I should be eating healthy. At least the fries still have the skin on them! :)
• We find out if we are having a boy or girl on March 23rd...if baby is cooperating!
• I have a baby bump. (I'll put pics up soon)
• Michael's mom is going to keep the baby next year....such a blessing!
• I still find myself tearing up when I look at baby stuff or put on maternity jeans...just in awe of this miracle!
• I am up for suggestions on baby items that you have used and found helpful! (it's overwhelming with all of the stuff that's out there now)
• Michael is already a great dad! He loves to rub the belly and talk to his little one. He even got a birthday card for me from our little peanut! (He's just a little excited!)

Thank you Jesus for this baby inside of me!

A Christmas to Remember

Where do I ever begin with this post?

On December 2nd Michael and I went to our first appointment with a fertility specialist. We absolutely loved this Dr. and the entire office staff. They were so incredibly kind and supportive. We left the appointment that day with so much peace and with a plan. The plan was to come in on my 3rd day of my next cycle to get some more blood work done. Then, in January we would do our first cycle of Clomid and IUI. I was not on Clomid this cycle. We were excited, but nervous too about the upcoming decisions and procedures. During the appointment, the Dr. did an ultrasound to check my uterus and ovaries. I jokingly said, "there's not a baby in there is there?" She confirmed that in fact there was not a baby in my uterus. Even though we heard that I was not pregnant once again at that appointment, we still had an overwhelming amount of peace. It wasn't the typically reaction upon finding out that yet again, this was not the month. Just peace, that's the only way I can describe it.

So, we would wait...wait for my cycle to start so I could go in for my blood work and start our "plan" of action! So we waited....and waited....and waited....and nothing....a day late....a few days late....

When you suffer from infertility, this is a tough place to be because there have been months where I've had no period at all so this was nothing too abnormal. I had a strange feeling about this time though. I didn't test until I was about a week late because the hope that I may be pregnant is more fun than testing to find out that I'm not...

Friday after work I went to the store and bought a test...the digital kind that says the words, "not pregnant" or "pregnant" on them. I couldn't even wait until Michael was home from school. I tested when I got home from the store. At first I just couldn't look at it. Finally I looked and could not believe when I saw the word "PREGNANT." I immediately began trembling and crying and praising the Lord. I kept going back to look at the test to make sure the word "not" didn't show up later! I couldn't even wait until Michael walked in the door, I had to call him. Luckily he was on his way home! A few hours after he got home I tested again and had another positive test. We cried lots of tears of joy and just began praising the faithful God who we serve who hears our prayers. He is a God of miracles! We are so thankful for all of the people who have gone to battle for us in this long journey. We pray now for a healthy baby who will grow up to love Jesus! We pray that He will use our story to give hope and comfort to others and that He can use us to minister to those who go through infertility.

Our miracle baby McCracken will make his/her debut in August! We are so blessed! For this child we have prayed! Nothing is impossible with Him! Praise Jesus!